Take it all and give me back my life

This isn’t my life,

I’m not used to the lights,
Or the girls in fancy tights,
Having to be the spot,
Just because I stand out,

Sometimes I wish I was on an operating table,
For the pathologist to cut through my lies,
What else can this be?
If it isn’t a lie?
I’m not happy when I step out,
Or when they step in,
I want to let go,
Give this up,
I never asked for this,
I didn’t ask for greatness,
I don’t want the fame,
Neither do I want to be popular,
I want a simple life,
A life where I set my own standards,
Live without fear,
Or prejudice,
This is all I ask for,
I ask for my life back.

I gave up my dream,
And followed the money,
Sure thing,
I live the life,
But I’m I really happy?
What’s more important?
My happiness,
Or that of those around me?
I choose the latter,
So I do it everyday,
Make other people happy,
Make them see how good life is,
But suffer on the inside,
Feel the pressure,
Of being touted as the best,
But I’m I really the best?
Or is this what they tell me to ward off the interest,
Of quitting this life,
And actually start to live,
See the essence of life,
The joy of being alive,
Not just the pleasure of living the life.

I’d cry myself to sleep,
But I was taught men don’t cry,
So I soldier on,
Live through my pain,
Hurt doesn’t have to be physical,
Sometimes it’s psychological,
Just because I put on a smile,
Doesn’t show that I’m happy,
Or simply because I frown,
Doesn’t mean that I’m angry,
I just look back in time,
Wish I could turn it’s hands,
With more than six watches in my drawer,
I tend to keep time,
But I lost track of time,
I guess my time lapsed,
Now I have to fill the dried cracks,
With more lies,
Success isn’t the best thing in life,
Living your life happily,
That is the joy of life.

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